July 28, 2008
Highlights from RAGBRAI XXXVI: Or, Nasty runs thicker than blood
Another year, another RAGBRAI come and gone, and it's time to remember what really stood out. Not the pain or injuries or tired muscles, but the stuff that happened to distract us from all of that. That's what the 'brai is all about: distractions.
Before I go into the highlights from this year, I would refer you back to a few posts from '06: here, here, and here. Now compare:
1) Upon arrival at Cono, we sang "He watching over Israel" from the "Elijah" several times with some Belz/Drexler/Kaufmann harmonies. Then we opened up the Messiah and proceeded to sing it out of order, with Covenant alum/tenor extraordinaire Rick Quinn as our soloist, as well as a few Sammy Summers to help us along. We didn't quite get all the notes on "Great was the company of the preachers," but once we hit some homophonics we nailed them.
2) Speaking of Rick, we almost left him at the lunch stop when Team Nasty jetted off on the school bus.
3) The first night in Missouri Valley we lay on the grass and watched the lightning storms in the distance as our resident bike mechanic/climatologist Colin explained the intricacies of weather patterns to us. We oohed and aahed.
4) In Harlan the second night we hit up a Team Goodbeer pub which featured karaoke with a talented 11-year-old guitarist. Joe's moving rendition of "Stairway to Heaven" was a huge hit with the RAGBRAI crowd. Plus they had free popcorn, an inexplicable trend this year.
5) After karaoke we flagged down a pickup truck to hitch a ride to downtown Harlan and some fine dining at the local Pizza Ranch. Ten or so of us squeezed into the back and heckled the suckers who were actually riding their bikes around town: "Gas, not gears!" "Biking sucks, driving rocks!" "Driving is faster!" etc.
6) Ames. Styx concert. What more can be said? If only they had played Mr. Roboto, the concert wouldn't have been such a colossal disappointment. Many of the old-timers enjoyed "Come Sail Away," however, and were singing various versions of it on the road the next day.
7) One night (in Tama) we stayed in the yard of a pastor's family's house (friends of Leahnasty). Everything was ideal: plenty of space for our tents, shade trees, chairs, campfire, spaghetti, s'mores. We thought we had it pretty good. Early the next morning the pastor disappeared into the shed and came out with a roaring chainsaw raised in the air, prompting Joelnasty to declare: "I KNEW there was a catch!"
8) In North Liberty we were joined by Cono folks and the New City disaster response team for a meal in the local PCA church. Brats, potato salad, green salad, watermelon, and chips were just what the doctor ordered. And bars for dessert (ahem, not bar cookies).
9) Later that night we were searching for another Team Goodbeer watering hole called "Dink's." We couldn't find it and Joelnasty went to ask Team Hawkeye where it was located (figuring any Hawkeye fan would know his or her way around). He came back and said with cutting delivery: "It's down a block and then left. And it's 'Drinks,' not Dink's!" This was met with responses in similar fashion from Joshnasty: "I'm tirsty." "Later we'll go to 'Fod' to get something to eat."
10) On day three, Team Nasty came together in true Nasty spirit. Forced to stop in Boone because Eliot's chain had fallen off, the entire team except for Team Drexler rerouted into a car wash parking lot and started biking in an unbroken circle. Joe and Joel went the extra mile and made inner circles within the larger circle. It was a beautiful sight, made better when Rick started up the car wash and we all glided through six minutes of free water spray. It became known as the "Circle of Trust," entering RAGBRAI lore as THE highlight of the week.
11) While we sat on the grass on the final night, Eliot inadvertently flung a half-empty beer bottle over his back onto Rick's sleeping form, spilling beer all over his pants and eliciting a few choice words from Rick and hysterical laughter from the rest of us.
12) Later that night, Joe, Joel, Laura and I checked out the cover band making a lot of noise near our campground. They called themselves "Corporate Rock" and were playing to a grand total of eight people. Joel would run up to the stage and jump off into nothing. But it was an amazing concert, especially since they ended by playing "Freebird" without us even asking for it.
13) By sheer luck I grabbed a rather large, in-demand, succulent, recently alive pork chop from a barrel at one of the food vendors. Best meal all week.
14) Who knew Iowa had so many grandiose Aquatic Centers? They got better and better with each town. Waterslides, lazy rivers, high dives - each one had something for everyone, both the adventurous and the lazy.
15) The Chiquita Banana man. Driving into South Amana (I sag-wagoned about half the week on account of my achilles tendon), I spotted the top half of his head sticking out from the elaborate yellow cardboard costume on his recumbent bike. It was decorated with a Chiquita sticker and flashing lights on the back. Best costume ever.
16) On the coldest day a bunch of us huddled into the Caravan coffee trailer to drink our coffee on the side of the road. Then we biked on to Vining, a town of 70 in the Vining Alps that was serving up $1.00 pancakes and french toast and eggs and sausage to the huddled masses in the town meeting hall. I think we ate them out of the rest of their year's supply of food.
17) On Friday, Dave, Brent D., and Laura sidled up to a man with a "beer holster." After a thoughtful glance from Dave, the man shouted, "You
look like you need a beer!" He executed the Bud Light handoff flawlessly. After Dave took a couple swigs, he thrusted the can towards Laura as she sped down a hill. Then Brent yelled, "I'll take it at the bottom." Successful all around.
18) Rocky Mountain oysters, Boulevard beer, and volleyball made for a fun-filled afternoon of lolly-gagging in Albion. Joe, Dave, Laura,
Colin, and Ben joined the volleyball group for an intense match. At one point, the gruff man we all dubbed "Moses" jumped in and
complimented Laura after a backwards winner: "Way to be aware," with finger pointed, sunglasses concealing any emotion. His long gray beard
gathered in a rubber band at the tip.
19) A bunch of Nasties spent their final ten minutes in Morley playing basketball with a borrowed ball from a bunch of rascaly boys. One of those boys, an official volunteer, warned Laura that "RAGBRAI wants you out of here by 3:30. You guys have to leave here in 10 minutes, you can't use our toilets or anything after that." After this dire warning from a 10 year old, the Nasties departed Morley around 3:35.
20) Brian Bailey and Joel Knutson brought the "hypothetical fight" game to life with a wrestling match to the death. Actually it was for a
funnel cake. Wrestling matches are always funnier to watch in the dark. Their mangled, spidery bodies thumped the ground in silence broken
only by giggles from the crowd and Joel's pained cries as he tried to free himself from BB's iron hold. In the end he failed, but the endless coil of their limbs (where one ended the other began) didn't fail to put us all in hysterics.
21) A band in Maysville, consisting of an old fart and his wife and some guy on the keyboard, entertained us with the song "Strokin'!" Some of
the choice lyrics, spoken over the same three chords repeated endlessly:
"Strokin to the east...Strokin to the west...Strokin the woman that I love best."
"Have you ever made love in the back of an old [fill in the blank with some kind of vehicle]? I have!"
"Last yesterday we was making love to my woman..."
Ahh, RAGBRAI....
Quotes of the week:
"You enjoy yourself, you deserve it."
"I'll cook your food!"
"The whole week captured in one concert...in one set!"
"It don't make no never mind."
"That was a whole LOT of never mind right there." [referring to Eliot's beer spill]
"Leave no nook or cranny unsmelt."
"Don't step in the Andrea over there."
"From whence doth the hammer droppeth?"
"There is no BODY there." [at the cover band concert]
"Rain, tornadoes...." [from a passerby the morning after the tornado watch]
Son: "Daddy, when are we going to get a good night's sleep?" Dad: "One of these nights, son. Even if it's the last night." [again, the morning after the tornado watch]
Aunt Sara and Kim were talking about Walker Pickle Days and how they had a blast because they made their own fun. It dawned on me that RAGBRAI is all about making your own fun. When else would I voluntarily listen to cover bands, drink Miller Light, take public cold showers, and sit on a hard seat for hours a day, except on RAGBRAI? Somehow in that context all that stuff is fun.
I saw a different side of RAGBRAI this year, as my achilles tendon and I navigated ourselves through the RAGBRAI machine. I got great medical care and lots of free ice bags from lots of great Iowa people. I talked to strangers I otherwise wouldn't have met, including some kindly people in Danish Kimballton who absolutely would not let me be stranded there with my injury (tendonasty we started to call it). One woman even offered to give me a ride to wherever I needed to go. Her colleague, a man in a wheelchair, came up to me and explicitly said that he wanted me to know how nice the people of the town were. Who DOES that? Laura experienced this same generosity when, on a rainy and windy day, one woman made her a jacket out of a trash bag. Iowans have this great personality, kindness and hospitality mixed with matter-of-factness and down-to-earthness, that I don't think exists anywhere else in this country. Granted, one or two meanies showed up along the way, but nothing is 100% perfect.
Here's a picture in the Des Moines Register of two people from Boston in State Center, IA. You can see the shadows from L to R of Dad, Laura, and me. At least we think so. Somehow one of us makes it into the paper every year.

A shout-out to the new Nasties this year. We had quite a few, all from Chattanooga, New York, and the DC area. I hope you'll join us again in '10, and I hope some former Nasties will re-appear out of the woodwork (Fiedler, this means you).
Posted by heiders at 8:54 AM | Comments (0)
July 13, 2008
Riding along the South Shore
Argh, I went and changed my blog design and now it's messed up. Ah well.
Yesterday Laura and I biked along the South Shore. Despite getting a little lost and dealing with a group of immature guys in a gas-guzzler shooting by us on a roundabout and idiotically yelling at us to "get on the sidewalk," we had a pleasant ride. Admittedly, I did fall once and got a bad case of the "jelly-legs" during the second half of the ride, but it was worth it to experience the majesty of the South Shore. It has everything you would expect of a New England coast: lighthouses, harbors, modest beaches, parking restrictions, mansions, sailboats, and best of all, general flatness. We stopped at North Scituate Beach for a lovely 1.5 hours to eat Power Bars, nap on our backpacks, and swim in our bike clothes. We passed through many small towns, our most favorite being Scituate. I'd like to go back sometime and check out the quaint shops and restaurants.
Here are some ways the ride simulated RAGBRAI:
1) small town pass-throughs
2) small rolling hills (although many of Iowa's hills are bigger)
3) getting water from random places, including a jug at a gas station out of which the mechanics had been drinking
4) stopping for an hour to swim in afore-mentioned bike clothes
5) stuffing our faces
6) pain in the back, neck, shoulders, legs...heck, everywhere.
Ways it did NOT simulate RAGBRAI:
1) no cyclists pushing up the hills with me; instead, lots of cars were rushing unsympathetically past
2) nobody to greet us in the towns
3) no beer
4) no Mr. Pork Chop
5) the Atlantic Ocean was available to us
6) the mansions
7) we rode home on the T
OK, there are a LOT of ways this ride wasn't like RAGBRAI. For one, we had not yet made our RAGBRAI mix. Now it is done, but it is not public and I won't reveal it until then. It is probably the awesomest RAGBRAI mix ever.
In case you are curious, here is the route we took yesterday. It totaled 46.12 miles, but to me and my out-of-shapeness it felt like 70!
Posted by heiders at 12:29 PM | Comments (3)
July 6, 2008
epic
Today I watched the most epic Wimbledon final, perhaps even overall match, that I have ever seen. It rivals the time Agassi came back from 2 sets down to win the French Open some time in the 90's. I remember that day: we watched a bit that morning, then left for church, then came back several hours later to find they were still at it. Nadal won on a day full of drama, darkness, rain, tears, winners, long rallies, and class. Nadal's backhand beat Federer's forehand. It was the longest championship match ever at 4 hours and 48 minutes, and the only Wimbledon final to ever go past 9 p.m. Epic, indeed.
I'm realizing that my blog is worth only the frequency of my entries. So I'm going to try to blog more. Even if every entry is about sports.
Posted by heiders at 7:20 PM | Comments (1)